Raspberry 33


I return from a mysterious 36-hour illness which reminded me a bit of this. Let me backtrack..

About a week ago I spontaneously attended a Pacific Islander festival. Friend and I paid $10.99  for above 1.75 liters of Smirnoff. For that price I could ignore the “raspberry infusion” in this particular bottle. We had a great time talking, laughing, eating ethnic food, watching a dance show, splitting raspberry vodka with other friends. The following morning I awoke to a mostly empty vodka bottle on my desk accompanied by a strange handwritten note:

Raspberry 33,

Enchanted fruit injects

Dark madness into me..

Don’t remember writing those words but I do that all the time – odd scribblings turn up under my bed, inside my pockets, beneath car seat, even saved inside my computer. “Raspberry 33” made sense because for years I’ve maligned vodka “flavors” as synthetic travesties: “Oh, yuck, is that Vanilla #24?”, “Who wants to ruin good vodka with Grape #12?”, “Real vodka should not taste like pear..”, etc. Yes, I could see why I scribbled “Raspberry 33” but last line seemed to have no relevance to such a fun evening.  Shaking my head I tossed piece of paper back onto desk, deposited vodka into freezer, continued with day.

Nearly a full week later (this past Friday) I finished packing for upcoming shoot and decided to pour myself a drink before bed. Bottle of Raspberry 33 lay waiting. I loaded final props into suitcase, zipped it with finality, watched end of Boogie Nights with vodka in hand. Hours later, as previously mentioned, this happened. I don’t know why. Two days later I have wracked my brain trying to figure out what had affected me so adversely. A friend and I had had some potato tacos, later I’d made an omelette out of fresh eggs and freshly washed vegetables.. and I’d drunk some of the remaining Raspberry 33. For the record, friend and I had been pouring vodka into plastic containers for everyone at the Pacific Islander festival so the bottle itself stayed just as clean as when we bought it. Honestly, I don’t think germs would live on a liquor bottle anyway, especially not after a week in the freezer. During the worst of my illness I remembered that strange poem I had written and suddenly the words assaulted me with haunting clarity:

Raspberry 33,

Enchanted fruit injects

Dark madness into me..

Lol.. anyone who has experienced a bad case of food poisoning knows how the mind can wander when subject to extreme dehydration. Recovery took from Friday night til noon today. Needless to say I had to reschedule my shoot. A few minutes ago I logged onto computer only to find STJ’s latest e-mail blast of photos. Check out those raspberry streaks in Nicole Oring‘s hair, raspberry flower barrette, and raspberry trimmed bikini:

Raspberry 33
Dark memory
Scripted into breathtaking finality.

Maybe I need to avoid all things raspberry for a while 😉

Many thanks to custom photo/video collectors who have to wait a little longer for me to shoot. I do have a newly scheduled date. Hope everyone is having a great weekend! I will return to answer post comments after I drink another half gallon of water. Still trying to re-hydrate.. so grateful to regain good health.

XO Tanya



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Back to the 90s..

Was probably in my early 20s here – funny how I never looked “young”, per se
Renee Ryan – so hot. Never saw her again after this.
Very serious about winning those pay-per-view bucks 🙂
Maybe this was Eden? Very beautiful woman. Not entirely sure of her name. She became upset on the day of the contest, was not accustomed to dancing nude in front of a live audience. Think the rest of us were all professional strippers.
Think this was Debi
Lol.. high-waisted and haughty

Good morning,

Long before either the Internet or DVDs became prevalent naked women vied for cash on pay-per-view TV specials. Above you see pics from one such PPV event – the Beverly Hills Short Shorts Contest. Back then I don’t even recall anyone using the term “booty shorts”.  Just look at the high-waisted numbers we used to wear:

I thoroughly enjoyed these photos, love trips down memory lane. Please visit store of ebay seller who posted them. Release date for Bevery Hills Short Shorts Contest DVD is 2003 but we probably shot footage in early 1990s. Good to see material is still circulating – I have fond memories of those days.

Hope everyone is doing well. I will return to answer post comments later today.

XO Tanya



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Mirror Episodes

Cali Kiss
Another Cali Kiss – thanks for finding these pics, Chris!


Not long ago I ran into a friend who is now living on the street. I will call him Dean. We agreed to get together later in the week and I hoped I could think of something to help him out. A day before our meeting I went to a local donut shop where a man in the parking lot was staring intently through donut shop window. It occurred to me that he was scrutinizing the premises with an unusual amount of care but I had pretty much forgotten about him by the time I was ordering coffee. Shop proprietress stayed deep in conversation with another patron while she poured my drink. “You are so good-looking.” she was telling him. “Your eyes are so green.. look at how handsome you are..  people look at you because you are so handsome… ” Customer was proffering little response and I had the opportunity to observe him from behind. His skin and clothing indicated that he was living a pretty rough existence. Suddenly he turned, our eyes met, we both smiled. Indeed, he had a very magnetic face but his ruined teeth told a story of their own – lots of hard years. He and I sat at separate tables while proprietress continued pep talk.

Another customer entered, ordered something, placed himself near me. For some reason his very aura set me on edge so I laser-focused attention on notepad in front of me without once looking at him. Green-eyed guy left and the remaining man began asking proprietress questions about him. Within a few sentences it became clear that remaining man was completely fixated on the green-eyed man. I didn’t even need to glance at him to realize that he was also the person who had been staring into the shop from the parking lot. Proprietress seemed disconcerted by the barrage of questions and wasn’t saying much, quite unusual for her.

“Was that guy talking about me?” remaining man finally blurted, unable to contain himself. “If he said I was looking at him then he is crazy. That guy is crazy!”

Pieces fell into place. Remaining guy had been doing everything possible to attract the attention of green-eyed man and now he was humiliating himself even more as he tried to pretend the opposite. He reminded me of countless men I’ve encountered at strip clubs who pretend to watch sports in a topless bar, turn their backs to the stage, pretend their friends dragged them in the joint, feign disdain for the dancers, pretend they came to a nude club for the food, pretend this, pretend that, maybe fooling themselves (I doubt it) but nobody else.

I should mention here that I live in an area well known for availability of male prostitutes who service men for money or drugs. Second customer had probably been hoping to get lucky if he wished hard enough.

Fast forward to the next day…   Dean and I met for coffee as scheduled. At Starbucks Dean touchingly offered to pay the bill but of course I refused. Over conversation it became apparent that he had become quite resigned to his circumstances, no longer really trying to get off the street. Out the corner of my eye I noticed a man staring fixedly at our table, imploring Dean to look at him. Without making mention of it Dean simply stood up, turned his chair around so his back faced the man, and continued talking with me. The staring man would not give it a rest, causing my hackles to rise. I could see that Dean felt eyeballs boring into his back. Eventually my friend just broke. Our coffee date had started on a cheerful note but now Dean was unreservedly displaying odd behavior which caught the attention of everyone nearby, almost like he was manifesting the mindset: “OK, if you’re going to stare at me like I’m not human then I will really give you something to stare at.” I tried to get him to calm down – no luck. He was acting like the stereotypical “crazy homeless guy” that everyone in large urban areas has encountered. Finally I left, feeling heartsick and helpless, because Dean was beginning to direct his animosity toward me. We have not seen each other since.

Last summer I made mention of a man at the grocery store filming me like I was an animal at the zoo. The unattractive man (I speak boldly because he made himself unattractive) at the donut shop and the creep at Starbucks were behaving in the same manner, so eager for acknowledgement that they fell all over themselves like slobbering idiots. Any of those three people could have observed us without attracting our attention but it was our attention that they so desperately craved. Where am I going with this? I don’t know. Just felt like getting it off my chest. Green-eyed man and I will likely continue to ignore fools but I worry about Dean. For the record, I no longer wear crop tops in public (crux of grocery store episode. ) All of us live in the Land of Fruits and Nuts (AKA California) and I wish people would at least loosely respect that old adage: “It’s not polite to stare.”

Saw great piece of street art last weekend (top pic) and it strikes me as a fitting amalgamation of the good and bad out here in Cali. Check out the license plate on that vehicle.



Song playing in head.. “Welcome to the Hotel California..


Staying Cool

Long Beach, CA street art off Atlantic Blvd., possibly near Willow
Seasonal Surprise from “Summertime Rune”
Frosted in the Summertime

Good afternoon,

I awoke at midnight with the vague sense that something “big” was going to happen today. Nothing so far but I’m drinking lots of water, staying cool in current Los Angeles heat wave. Saw awesome street art (top pic) the other afternoon when I got off Metrolink train at random stop and went for a walk. Nudie shots come from soon-to-be-released Summertime Rune created in July 2016:

Summertime Rune

“I feel like I want Lisa more than she wants me.” you confess to Aunt Jillian. “We have fun when we’re together but sometimes she barely responds to my calls. Lately I’ve been acting more detached – just like she does – and it seems like we are drifting even further apart.” Aunt Jillian takes long pull from highball glass, responds bluntly: “If Lisa’s a female and you are playing ‘hard to get’ like a girl then nothing will ever work out.” Words stab your fragile heart like a spear. Without relinquishing beverage Aunt Jillian rises, selects thick tome from bookshelf, thumbs to specific page. “Make no mistake about it.” Jillian proclaims.”You need to go after what you want. Here’s a magical rune which works only on night of the strawberry moon. When you release dripping fluids mentioned in text you must simultaneously utter these exact phrases:

“Star-crossed June, full strawberry moon,

Cracked lightning arcs through midnight sky,

Oh, just have some fun – do or die!

Rich, dripping fluids usher in

Enchanting, entrancing July.. ”

Completely baffled, you sputter: “What’s a strawberry moon? What’s a rune? Cracked lightning? What kind of dripping fluid? Do or die??” Jillian regards you with sage 80-year-old eyes. “Do some research.” she says rather unhelpfully. “Your relationship will wither away unless you take dramatic action. A “rune” is a spell – if you implement details correctly Lisa will be your girl for life..”

In this post-surgery week I have become something of a lady of leisure but I am starting to snap out of it. Just posted Cyborg at my Diamond Club Members’ Area along with 40 other selections.  Join now to check them out Later today I will release Summertime Rune at TanyaTV.com and answer post comments. Hope everyone is having a great week so far!

XO Tanya



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Heady Sky – 4th of July

Incomparable Hedy Lamarr – Mural near 1st and Cherry Streets in Long Beach, California

Happy 4th of July! Fireworks will abound tonight and I have already ensconced myself at home with feline companions, one of whom especially dislikes loud noises. As always, many thanks and much love to current and former members of the US military who have nobly served our country.

I have been recovering from surgery and finally have a chance to begin responding to accumulated post comments. Happy to report that Mingori correctly identified amazing Hedy Lamarr from the mural paintings in this post. In my mind portrait of Hedy actually bears a slight resemblance to former Vivid contract star Sky Lopez.

Hedy Lamarr
Sky Lopez
Hedy – Actress/Inventor
Sky – Actress/Hip hop artist

Love Sky Lopez. And Hedy. Sky and I both starred in Jim Holliday’s High Desert Pirates although we unfortunately did not have a chance to do a scene together. Looks like Sky’s contribution was nominated for an AVN Best Female Scene Award before she renounced pornography.

High Desert Pirates

Btw.. if you look carefully at above box cover you will notice something peculiar 😉

Think I could stare at Sky Lopez all day long. So lovely. Intoxicating to my eyeballs.

Here’s another snippet from Sky’s Wikipedia page: “Despite her growing popularity, the actress decided to withdraw from the community in 2005. She accused the adult industry of being ‘a long winding road that leads to self-destruction, a villain World that I do not recommend to anyone .'” I believe we shot High Desert Pirates about a year before she made that statement. Seems like a lifetime ago.

Going to have some lunch but will return later to answer more post comments. Again, Happy Independence Day to all my fellow  US citizens!

XO Tanya



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