Reporter Ralph Axe is having flashbacks from his research..
After a year spent covering LA’s underground fight scene reporter Ralph Axe still ponders moral complexities associated with such a violent, unsanctioned sport. Ralph glances at last night’s notes from an event featuring hometown favorite Tanya Danielle vs. Cajun sensation Prinzzess Felicity Jade:
“Crazed eyes evaluate distress,
Assess degree of injury,
Jeer with exaggerated zest,
Until foe rises gingerly,
New vigor swelling in her chest.”
Honestly, Ralph can’t remember which combatant had first dominated the match. Alternating beatdowns, flurried exchanges, several near KOs had driven the crowd into a roaring, cheering frenzy for thirty minutes straight. Now, just moments before sunrise, Ralph takes a long pull of whiskey before simply placing his aching head atop a well-worn Daily Bugle desk. Only one thing seems certain: more than one cranium will pound with regret in the morning.
I have been posting numerous photos from Ides of Perfection starring Prinzzess Felicity Jade vs. myself (above) throughout January at my OnlyFans Twitter feed.
IDES OF PERFECTION
Attempts to psychoanalyze disturbing February 13 incident tax police sergeant’s brain. Yet again he scrutinizes handwritten note found at one combatant’s home:
“Icy blonde perfection,
Every sense in me
Shocked beyond redemption.”
Guilt and obsession saturate words but cop doesn’t know if Tanya Danielle penned note before or after her stunning melee with Prinzzess Felicity Jade. Has a crime been committed? Thus far no one can agree whether sexual component of wrestling match had happened spontaneously or resulted from premeditation. Once more cop pops DVD into player, labors to decide what charges, if any, Tanya Danielle should face.
Join Officer Smedley in viewing the footage which has scandalized an entire metropolitan police force..
I will probably release the video in mid-February, just in time for both the Ides of February and Valentine’s Day 😉
I just added Stadium Thrill starring Jewell Marceau vs. myself to my Clips4Sale store. Ringmaster STJ’s backyard wrestling ring probably does not qualify as a “stadium” but I can’t seem to resist the verbiage:
“All muscles, no strength.” wrestler sneers,
“Wait til the bell rings.” model jeers,
Adrenaline pounds cranium,
Insanity fills stadium,
Testosterone-infused crowd cheers..
Wrestler jerks awake, pouring sweat. Strange dream had coupled snippets of trash talk with head-pounding pain. Might it be predicting dire outcome of upcoming match? Wrestler dismisses notion after five seconds of reflection. “No fitness model, especially Jewell Marceau, has enough skills to cause me even one iota of pain.” she blurts aloud to empty room..
Yep, Jewell Marceau and I are back in all our trash talking glory. In honor of this long-awaited reunion I have put Stadium Thrill on sale for $19.99 (regularly $38.99) through Sunday, September 3. Funny, about 16 hours after this match I was lying on an operating table as I underwent surgery. Almost completely healed now and working on photos which accompany video footage. Thanks so much to everyone who has posted comments. I really enjoy your feedback and have answered about 3/4 of recent messages. Will return tomorrow to answer more. Hope everyone is having a nice Monday!
I return from a mysterious 36-hour illness which reminded me a bit of this. Let me backtrack..
About a week ago I spontaneously attended a Pacific Islander festival. Friend and I paid $10.99 for above 1.75 liters of Smirnoff. For that price I could ignore the “raspberry infusion” in this particular bottle. We had a great time talking, laughing, eating ethnic food, watching a dance show, splitting raspberry vodka with other friends. The following morning I awoke to a mostly empty vodka bottle on my desk accompanied by a strange handwritten note:
Enchanted fruit injects
Dark madness into me..
Don’t remember writing those words but I do that all the time – odd scribblings turn up under my bed, inside my pockets, beneath car seat, even saved inside my computer. “Raspberry 33” made sense because for years I’ve maligned vodka “flavors” as synthetic travesties: “Oh, yuck, is that Vanilla #24?”, “Who wants to ruin good vodka with Grape #12?”, “Real vodka should not taste like pear..”, etc. Yes, I could see why I scribbled “Raspberry 33” but last line seemed to have no relevance to such a fun evening. Shaking my head I tossed piece of paper back onto desk, deposited vodka into freezer, continued with day.
Nearly a full week later (this past Friday) I finished packing for upcoming shoot and decided to pour myself a drink before bed. Bottle of Raspberry 33 lay waiting. I loaded final props into suitcase, zipped it with finality, watched end of Boogie Nights with vodka in hand. Hours later, as previously mentioned, this happened. I don’t know why. Two days later I have wracked my brain trying to figure out what had affected me so adversely. A friend and I had had some potato tacos, later I’d made an omelette out of fresh eggs and freshly washed vegetables.. and I’d drunk some of the remaining Raspberry 33. For the record, friend and I had been pouring vodka into plastic containers for everyone at the Pacific Islander festival so the bottle itself stayed just as clean as when we bought it. Honestly, I don’t think germs would live on a liquor bottle anyway, especially not after a week in the freezer. During the worst of my illness I remembered that strange poem I had written and suddenly the words assaulted me with haunting clarity:
Enchanted fruit injects
Dark madness into me..
Lol.. anyone who has experienced a bad case of food poisoning knows how the mind can wander when subject to extreme dehydration. Recovery took from Friday night til noon today. Needless to say I had to reschedule my shoot. A few minutes ago I logged onto computer only to find STJ’s latest e-mail blast of photos. Check out those raspberry streaks in Nicole Oring‘s hair, raspberry flower barrette, and raspberry trimmed bikini:
Maybe I need to avoid all things raspberry for a while 😉
Many thanks to custom photo/video collectors who have to wait a little longer for me to shoot. I do have a newly scheduled date. Hope everyone is having a great weekend! I will return to answer post comments after I drink another half gallon of water. Still trying to re-hydrate.. so grateful to regain good health.
Hosting company had an outage so you may have noticed that TanyaDanielle.com went down for about 24 hours. Now I’m back in action.. sort of. Pics from Friday (Saharra Huxly vs. someone I used to know) speak for themselves.
This is how I spent weekend after the match:
Lol.. my site had an outage and so did I. Just kidding.. pic above is from soon-to-be-released video Mind Fuck but it does sort of reflect how I’ve been feeling since Friday. Hope everyone had a pleasant Monday. Please check out my newest updates for the week:
Casaba, honeydew, papaya, quince –
Rich, fruity horticultural reserves
Used for speed bags, drills, target practice thence
Smashed into jam, pie filling, sweet preserves.
Heed warning, Temptress, hide your succulence!
Disconcerted by words Mrs. Hamilton unconsciously raises hand to cleavage, wonders if Prinzzess might be leveling some type of threat. Admittedly English teacher has used large breasts to seduce numerous 18-year-old male pupils but Prinzzess can’t know that, can she? Dismissing notion educator slashes red “C-” across page, returns it to Prinzzess the following morning. Several hours later classroom door flies open to reveal pair of stunningly feral, catlike eyes. “Stay away from my boyfriend.” Prinzzess hisses ferociously, clouds of yellow fire emitting from hazel irises. “Or I will smash your huge tits into oblivion!!” Naturally Mrs. Hamilton will brook no such disrespect from a mere student..